5 Key Questions in Planning a Difficult Conversation
- What is the key focus or concern to be discussed during the conversation?
- How have standards and expectations connected to this concern been previously articulated to the person?
- What is the desired outcome for the conversation?
- How involved would you like the other person to be in thinking through solutions to the concern (remembering that coaching and collaboration work best with Glickman’s Quadrants II-III-IV staff)?
- Knowing you are committed to your role as a Coach Leader, what will you intentionally do and how will you “be” during this conversation?
Principles of Dealing with Difficult Employees
- Hold up clear expectations and standards during the hiring process (and each new year) to get full agreement for buy-in. Revisit early & often throughout the year. Lead conversations about the “why” and the “how.”
- Use elements of SCARF & Reflective Feedback to intervene as soon as you notice concerns or “red flags.”
- Use data and research to have credible, accurate & specific examples of concerns. Private conversations using the conversation frame create clarity and awareness of the issues and plans for self-correction.
- Calendarize timelines and dates for follow-up observations and reflective feedback.
- View Growth Plan as road maps to success not first steps to termination. Use “growth mentality” for all—differentiate.
- Termination may be necessary. Use influence to support others to view as an opportunity to find the best position and greater job satisfaction for the person.
- Monitor your self awareness/emotion. How do I want to “be” throughout the process?
Remember what you have learned about Dr. Carl Glickman’s model of Supervision.
(Reference: Results Coaching: Next Steps—Chapter 4)
Here is some sample language to “jog” your language skills.
SAMPLE LANGUAGE – GLICKMAN’S MODEL OF SUPERVISION
Quadrant 1: Directive
- You came into this profession to make a difference. You were hired because of your knowledge, skills and/or tools—which are…
- The expectations of the position have been articulated to be…
- The urgency of your actions is…
- It is immediately critical to see the following…
- Some evidence of it would look like…
- Your timeline for it is…
- On a scale of 1–10, what is your commitment to this goal/action/timeline?
- I look forward to your success and reviewing your evidence on…
Quadrant 2: Collaborative/Coaching
- Your energy and commitment to your work is evident.
- This conversation is just to review and revisit the standards/expectations that will be so important to your success in the position.
- How are you assessing your success? What evidence are you noticing?
- What do you hope to celebrate about this in a couple of weeks?
Quadrant 3: Coaching with Specific Follow-Up Timelines
- You came into this profession to make a difference and have been doing that for many years. Your years of service are…; Your knowledge, skills, or gifts are…
- You are very aware of the huge accountability changes in our profession and the expectations that we face today; you are very aware of the standards we are held to; you have been at this long enough that you know…
- As you think about this requirement, what comes to mind as your best strategies or moves? How are you hoping to put this into action?
- With your knowledge and expertise, what will guide your self-assessment of your progress?
- Let’s talk again in 10 days so you can share what you are seeing and how it has impacted your results.
- So, your understanding of your focus and work is…