Brain research has identified that the brain constantly senses and assesses safety states—or threats. It is essential in communication to create safe environments for meaningful conversations, and we do this by presuming positive intent. We must believe the best in others—in their noble purpose, their desire to do their best, their life experience, and the ideas, beliefs, or opinions they've formed. We listen to understand because their point of view matters. We listen for their passions and desires, and we presume the best. This is the mindset of a coach leader.. It is often challenging and may push against our status, certainty, or relatedness. But when our goal is real change and real commitment, we listen and speak with positive intent.
The International Coaching Federation defines the coaching mindset as a state of being that is open, curious, flexible, and client-centered.
Successful coach leaders:
- Acknowledge that clients are responsible for their own choices
- Engage in ongoing learning and development as a coach
- Develop an ongoing reflective practice to enhance their coaching
- Remain aware of and open to influence of context and culture on self and others
- Use awareness of self and intuition to benefit clients
- Develop and maintain the ability to regulate their emotions
- Mentally and emotionally prepare for sessions/conversations
- Seek help from outside sources when necessary
The most important function of a coach leader is to grow the thinking and talent of those they lead. The leader’s legacy will be a committed team of great thinkers, problem solvers, and new leaders who are more knowledgeable, confident, and competent than ever before.
The Coach Mindset
Growth Mindsets versus Fixed Mindsets
| Growth Mindset | Fixed Mindset |
|---|---|
| Failure is an opportunity to grow. | Failure is the limit of my abilities. |
| I can learn to do anything I want. | I'm either good at it or I'm not. |
| Challenges help me to grow. | My abilities are unchanging. |
| My effort and attitude determine my abilities. |
How does my mindset appear?
Levels of Language
Language examples
| Growth Mindset | Fixed Mindset |
|---|---|
| Is this really my best work? | It's good enough. |
| I can learn how to... | I'll never be smart. |
| Mistakes help me learn. | I made a mistake. |
| There is always Plan B. | Plan A failed. |
| I like to try new things | This is too hard. |
Levels of language
- Obligation (not): I am not good at this, and I will try harder.
- Options: Plan A failed, so I will go to Plan B.
- Preference: I want to choose that strategy because it's better.
- Passion: I am eager to move forward.
Coach mindset
- Believe in another's ability to grow and excel.
- Recognize that "advice is toxic."
- Use intentional language that aligns with trust and belief in others.
It is important for the coach to show up with a mindset that requires:
- Setting aside or suspending some behaviors
- Seeing the person as whole and capabale
- Being a model of committed listening and speaking