Coaching Mindset
Trustworthy: I honor confidentiality/ I do what I say I will do. I honor responsibilities and obligations/ I can always be counted on.
Nonjudgmental: I offer reflective feedback that supports thinking and reflection and presumes positive intent. I consider multiple points of view. I seek opportunities to practice dialogue. I set aside and suspend judgment as I gather data and information.
Results Focused: I see people as whole and capable. I support others in taking action toward their goals. I partner with others to plan, reflect, seek solutions, and make decisions. My conversations with others mediate their resources and options for their self direction and learning. I hold up the standards and expectations of the district and profession to guide and support high levels of learning and achievement for all. I set goals for my own learning and progress and reflect on my progress with a trusted colleague.
Intentional: I am intentional in how I “show up” for others. I use intentional language and continually reflect on my behavior and actions to ensure alignment with my goals to serve and support others in achieving their most successful results. My listening reflects my intention and commitment to really hear and understand.
Avoids Advice: I am mindful of the temptation of giving advice. I monitor my thinking and words and offer options via reflective feedback, holding up standards, using the language of others, noticing their assumptions, perceptions, thinking and decision-making processes.
Coaching has become the core of my being. It has transformed from what I do to who I am.
Committed Listening
I intentionally paraphrase in my thoughtful conversations with others.
I focus completely on what the speaker is saying and not saying, listening to both words and emotions to more fully understand meanings expressed by the speaker.
I set aside unproductive patterns of listening that cause my mind to judge, provide solutions, become overly inquisitive, or focus on my personal experiences.
I convey interest to the speaker both verbally and nonverbally, and I am observant of body language BMIRS).
I genuinely honor the speaker’s point of view even when it may be different from my own.
I listen for patterns of language that connect to the speaker’s values, beliefs, desires, goals, dilemmas, or obstacles.
I am comfortable with silence that allows others space to think and reflect.
Paraphrasing
I paraphrase the essence of what the speaker is saying and do so in an abbreviated way, and I listen for what the person wants.
I listen for both the content and emotions of the speaker. I recognize the importance of “witnessing the struggle.”
I paraphrase to summarize or organize the speakers thoughts and ideas for clarity and understanding.
I paraphrase to reframe thinking—from negative to positive, problem to solution, complain to commitment.
I am comfortable and aware of my use of paraphrasing and witness the power of paraphrasing with others.
Presume Positive Intent
I presume the speaker has positive intentions in all actions and behaviors.
I presume the speaker has already thought, said, or done what I’m asking about and my language conveys this.
I frequently use positive presuppositions in my own statements to demonstrate genuine belief in the positive thinking and actions of the speaker.
I hold up the district standards and expectations in my language while presuming others are desiring to follow and adhere to them.
Reflective Feedback
I take time to reflect before offering feedback and choose my words with care to convey respect and sincerity. I recognize the impact of SCARF on the brain and choose my words with care.
I am generous and specific with positive feedback. My feedback conveys the value or value potential that is crucial for repetition.
I ask clarifying questions for mutual understanding.
I ask reflective questions that communicate concerns or suggestions as possibilities. My reflective questions for possibilities presume another person’s knowledge, desire, and commitment. I use standards, research, common goals, core values, or data to frame my reflective questions, rather than my opinion, to provide nonjudgmental language and safety to another’s thinking.
I notice when I am about to use judgmental language such as great or wonderful, and I modify my language to identify the specifics and value of what a person has done.
I am aware of the importance of feedback for growth, improvement, and motivation. I balance my reflective feedback with value and reflective questions.
